Saving the world from Atrocious Fashion, One Celebrity at a Time

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Paula Gives Back

Posted by Mean Critic
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AMERICAN IDOL judges Simon Cowell, Paula Abdul and Randy Jackson and the show's host Ryan Seacrest have donated their salary's for the U.S. talent show's IDOL GIVES BACK charity fundraiser, which aired on last Wednesday (09Apr08), to charity. 

Rating: 3

While Paula's red is not really a major standout, what interests me is that this is the most decent outfit I have probably seen on her. And she actually looks good, well, except for the hideous hairstyle with matching red ribbon to boot.

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Paula Never Lies

Posted by Mean Critic
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Paula Abdul

“I'm grateful this ordeal is over, and I'm so looking forward to getting back to the job I love. Once again, I thank my fans from throughout the world for their undying love and support.”

“All the facts have been changed to get laughs at my expense. I hope you enjoy it.”

“All my life, I have been taught to take the high road, and never to dignify salacious or false accusations. And I have been taught never, never to lie. Not only do I never lie, I never respond to lies, no matter how vicious, no matter how hurtful.”

“I do trust my fans who can see through attempts at character assassination, and I do trust the essential fairness of the American public”

“I'm the most popular girl around. I've been giving mine away to everyone, and they're going insane over it.”

“When you have a show this successful it's crazy we haven't had any more discrepancies.”

“Great. Just what I needed was a compliment on my wardrobe from someone who's always on the worst-dressed list.”

Rating: 2

Sorry love, but the hair do, make up and the hideous dress can easily be the updated or modern day version of Frankenstein's bride. Paula, when will fire that stylist of yours?

Your choice of outfits is always good for laughs. 

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Paula Cleans Up

Posted by Mean Critic
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Music mogul Simon Cowell and his fellow American Idol judges have offered to help save Britney Spears' career - if she'll dump her entourage and take advice from them.

Cowell, former pop star Paula Abdul and producer Randy Jackson admit they were horrified by the troubled pop superstar's awful performance at the MTV Video Music Awards on Sunday and they want to help Spears get her career back on track.

British music mastermind Cowell, who earlier this week suggested the ill-advised performance may have "killed" Spears' career, now says, "We will take her under our wing for six months and we will produce a new Britney Spears."

And he insists he knows exactly what needs to be done to revamp the pop singer's chart topping career. He adds, "Keep her away from her stupid friends (and) buy her some underwear."

Speaking at the San Diego, California auditions for the next American Idol contest, Jackson added, "We are going to manage Britney, we're gonna take good care of her… Britney, if you're listening, we're here for you."

Rating: 2

Paula, the peek-a-boob gown won't get you to the best dressed list. Not even in the tolerable list. But honestly, this might have just been the best we have seen of Paula Abdul, but still a big no.

There's always a next time Paula. To borrow your own lines, believe in yourself, you are beautiful, you make me cry, blah, blah, blah.

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Paula’s Wardrobe Malfunctions

Posted by Mean Critic
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Mean Critic's Bai Ling's Disciples 2007 

5. Paula Abdul 

Some outfits we love to hate: two way lanes, she wants to be the bomb, childlike       

Rating: 2

When it comes to dressing up, Paula never gets it right. Her clothes are like doing crack when she's not looking. Can't she tell whether the outfit is for a nine year old or 99 for that matter? Her wardrobe should be tested, man.

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Paula Will Do An Angie Too

Posted by Mean Critic
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Paula Abdul is considering adoption if she is unable to have her own children biologically. The single 44-year-old wants to raise a child with a father figure, but if she fails to find a suitable man before it is physically impossible for her to get pregnant, she will adopt.

Abdul says, "With medical technology these days, I could have children by myself using a donor. But I would rather be in a relationship so the child has a father to help instill core values.

"If it's meant for me to have children naturally, I absolutely will. I love kids, I really do. And kids love me. I'm so open to the idea of adoption. But, again, I would like to be able to share the raising of the children."

Rating: 1

I've been traveling since I was 11 and I have been to different countries as well. That also means, I have been exposed to different flight crew uniforms. I swear there was a flight attendant's uniform very similar to Paula's orange number, they also had a scarf going on. But who cares what Paula wears, she will never make it to the best dressed list.

Paula's style is pretty much a milder version of Bai Ling but the same wackiness, I guess.

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Paula: Super Woman

Posted by Mean Critic
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American Idol judge Paula Abdul has denied reports she was fired from the Bratz movie, insisting she turned the role down. The Straight Up singer has blasted rumors she was dropped from the project by movie bosses, but blames her busy schedule for parting ways with the production.

In a statement released to UsMagazine.com, Paula Abdul's representative says, "She was not only taping American Idol three days at week, she was also filming her Bravo reality series Hey Paula! five days a week as well. In addition, she was in the process of not only expanding her successful QVC jewelry line but also coming up with the first scent in her new perfume line Sexy Thoughts."

"Something had to give and ultimately that was Bratz."

Rating: 2

Paula is doing so many things at the same time, it's no wonder she gets her meltdowns. I mean come on guys, she's doing Idol, her reality TV, her jewelry line at QVC, her perfume and last I heard, she's going to come out with an album! Do we finally get to hear Abdul sing on American Idol? Ka-ching! Seriously, Paula should stop the crying and whining because she is setting a bad example to Britney Spears. Her sense of style is painful, I feel like I want to pop some Advil myself!

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The Paula Abdul Smell

Posted by Mean Critic
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Eighties pop star-turned-AMERICAN IDOL judge Paula Abdul is set to launch her first fragrance after realising she has a good nose for a hit smell.

The Straight Up singer has partnered with noses at perfume firm Fermenich to create her new scent Sexy Thoughts.

She admits she only agreed to release the perfume after spraying it on her and taking it for a test smell - and getting a string of compliments.

She says, "It's fun, it's flirty, it's chic. It's sexy… It totally captures the spirit of who I am."

Abdul jokes she is now looking for a series of nasty smells so she can play a prank on music mogul pal and fellow Idol judge Simon Cowell.

She tells U.S. TV news show Access Hollywood, "In the middle of coming up with my fragrance line, I asked the question, 'By any chance do you have anything that smells like cat pee, and cow poop and, like, farts?'

"I want to put those elements - the cat pee, the horse poop and fart - in a bottle, and call it Ode to Simonella. I'm going to put it together and I'm going to surprise him next season, and douse it all over the chair (he's sitting on)."
 

Rating: 2

While this may look very appropriate for Pauls Adbul's age, I'm still not liking it. I don't know, but it kind of reminds me of those movies where Count Dracula gets to wear those fluffy shirt underneath his dark jacket. Heck, she could have borrowed this outfit from Wolfgang Amadeus for all I care.

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Hodge Podge II

Posted by Mean Critic
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Paula Abdul insists she is "great friends" with Simon Cowell despite their fiery onscreen relationship.

But the 44-year-old singer-turned-talent adjudicator admits she tries to avoid the star when he's being overly facetious.

She says, "Simon and I actually get along great. We have cultivated a fun relationship. He's actually become a really good friend."

And Abdul is adamant any rumors of a romance between the pair is wide of the mark.

She explains, "He makes this stuff up. He said, 'Paula, people want us to hook up so bad.' I said, 'That's disgusting.' He goes, 'Paula, I know you want me,' and I go, 'Like a cold sore.'

"We have fun playing up the chemistry, but there's also times when I would cross the other side of the street so I wouldn't have to look at him."

Rating: 2

Going horseback riding Paula?

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Paula Is A Bratz

Posted by Mean Critic
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Paula Abdul will star in and produce a movie based on the popular Bratz line of fashion dolls. Paula will play a major character in the live action film Bratz: The Movie and will serve as executive producer. She will also be involved in the film's casting, music, choreography and fashion. The film will follow four teenage girls from diverse backgrounds who want to be themselves and not fall victims to high school cliques. The movie will begin shooting in February 2007 and is scheduled for US release in August 2007.

Rating: 2

Paula shows us why she has a mind of a five year old.

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Loopy

Posted by Mean Critic
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Batting back rumors about her loopy behavior on American Idol, Abdul says in a magazine interview that she's never been drunk and has never used recreational drugs.  

Rating: 2

Paula tries the old Hollywood look. Yeah, it means she works in Hollywood and she's old.

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Major Overhaul?

Posted by Mean Critic
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For the next season of American Idol, the show will now charge anywhere from $500,000- $700,000 for a 30 second spot.

I'm sure Paula will have a lot more money to have more procedures done in the future perhaps?

Rating: 3

I can only tell it's Paula Abdul by her trademark mole, other than that I think there was a total overhaul. 

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Paula Does Normal

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